5.75 miles
hidden falls loop
37 degrees / sunny
Almost perfect mid-fall weather! Sun, clear paths, crisp air. I wore running tights, shorts, a long-sleeved purple shirt, orange sweatshirt, cap. Overheated at the halfway point, I took off the sweatshirt and tied it around my waist.
10 Things
- my shadow — sharp, solid, in front of me
- most of the leaves on the trail on the double bridge and the path below the road were gone — was it wind or a leaf blower? I heard both a few days ago
- in the beginning, the sky, especially above the river, was hazy — humidity, I think
- so much openness everywhere! limbs are bare so I could see the other side of the river
- openness 1: between ford overlook and hidden falls — the idea of the river/valley below, endless air then a the tops of trees, far off
- openness 2: running north on the west river road near 44th, a clear view of the curved wall and ravine
- the sound of water rushing over a cliff near the ford bridge
- a runner in light but BRIGHT orange shorts — the color of a creamsicle
- the loud thwack of fast feet striking the ground behind me then beside me then in front of me
- the wind pushing from behind, helping me feel fast
overheard: a mom, running, with 2 young kids on bikes
kid: whaaaaaaaaaa!!!!! how much longer?
mom: we have to go to the end of the road (note: another 3+ miles)
kid: (distraught) WE’RE NOT EVEN HALFWAY?!
mom: Get it together Charlie!
For the past week or so, my legs have been sore after runs and for the rest of the day. It’s a dull ache. It could be muscle fatigue, but it feels different than that. I looked up “dull ache, after run, vitamin deficiency” and google AI suggested electrolyte imbalance or dehydration. Yes, it feels like dehydration. I better drink a lot of water today.
time traveling
On Thursday, Scott and I went to hear Carolina Ebeid read at Milkweed/Open Book/the Loft. I have known Carolina since I was in my early 20s — maybe when I was 21? She is the sister of my sister’s ex-husband. Is there a name for that? I have read her beautiful poetry for the past decade, but I had not seen her for almost 20 years. As a poet, she has continued to be a part of my life, as a person, she is part of a past life I rarely have access to. A life when my mom was still alive, when we had family gatherings and holiday parties and book clubs and traditions, when I had a sister of a brother-in-law named Carolina and an aunt named Carolyn.
At the reading, Carolina read “Winternet” and I remember hearing the line,
I play a tape of conversations,
everyone young again
And I thought about the last time I recall seeing and talking to Carolina. Then, both of our mothers were alive, now they’re both dead. In her words and in talking with her, a flash of feeling, a remembering of what it felt like to be in my 20s with a mother still alive and an extended family all still together.
She ended her reading with this poem:
I Can’t Hear You When You’re Screaming/ Carolina Ebeid
line like a piece of twine, line like a piece of dry grass plant,
nail, a finger pointing there, a finger-shush, line like a cut
sewn up, a rupture stitched, like a bicycle cutting snow, a
game of telephone, line like a shift of cord between cans,
mouth-to-ear-to-mouth-to-ear repetitions, a human chain
saving a driver from flash floods (on loop in the gallery), a
barrette, a strand of hair latched in, we are each of us from
somewhere else, aloft for city miles the telephone wire, line
like city avenue traffic, dotted-with-shit avenue where the
horses have been, horses become beautiful noise, line like
string tied to a balloon, string tied to a door handled tied to
a tooth, every time there’s a boundary, we must appoint the
messenger to cross it, line like the space between a camera
and the calamity, line like an x-rayed rib, like a track of
menstrual blood thick down the thigh, parade spectator
line, trombone slide, a column or air inside, a column of air
with its spit trap, I can’t hear you when’re whispering, a
sunwind line, line of hair blown into a camera’s eye
So many versions of line, so many associations, wow!